You
have to start walking before you will know where you are going
A
lecture by Kim Michaels. NOTE: This lecture was
delivered on May 19, 2007 during the Shangra-la Ascension conference
in Ireland.
This lecture followed a dictation by Saint
Germain that you might want to read first.
The masters want me to speak as the Omega polarity to what Saint Germain
said, especially about my experience of starting the website. Because
you might look at the website now and say, "Well it has a certain
momentum, it has certainly got beyond that first hump." And you
might think that it was so easy to create the website because I had
Jesus' guidance and I had his support and his sponsorship and this and
that.
But you have to realize that I faced the exact same challenge that Saint
Germain was talking about—will this make a difference? Is it worthwhile
doing? Why even bother? Why break off my life, why change my life totally
– because I realized it would change my life dramatically
– when it might not make any difference?
And that's the same challenge you are all facing. Because the fact of
the matter is that the masters, and certainly me, do not want you to
look at Lorraine and I as being more special than you are. You have
to realize the truth of what the masters are saying—God is in
all of us. And this is the Aquarian age. There is not going to be one
Christed being who is going to be like Jesus was for the Piscean age.
If there is going to be a Golden Age and an awakening, there has to
be many, many people who dare to manifest their Christhood.
And certainly, the fact that you are open to the teachings on the website
– that talk about manifesting your Christhood – it should
show you that you know somewhere in your being that you have that potential.
Because otherwise you would not even be open to the teachings, they
would mean nothing to you, they wouldn't resonate with you.
So I know in your outer mind you can look at all these things, "Could
I possibly be worthy? What could I possibly do? I have this flaw, and
that flaw. I have done this and that." But you have to realize
that that's part of the human condition. And our goal is to overcome
that human condition. And that means anyone who has ever ascended, anyone
who has ever done something that was above the ordinary—well they
all had some human condition, some human flaw.
They talk about Paul—he talked about having a thorn in the flesh,
which I sense was a speech impediment—that he basically could
not talk unless he was overpowered by the spirit. And yet he became
the foremost preacher because he was willing to go beyond that and speak
anyway. And so we of our own selves can do nothing that can make a difference.
But we have to be realistic and realize that God is in us, and if we
are willing, then God in us can and WILL make a difference.
Stop limiting what God can do through you
I had many phases in my life that led me to the point where I am right
now. But one of the most important phases I went through was that there
were several years where I contemplated – I really came to understand
– that God is in all of us. And therefore, we all have the potential
to say with Jesus, "I and my Father are one. And I am not doing
the work, it is the Father within me."
And I came to the realization that I have to stop limiting what God
can do through me. Because I knew – and I started to see this
– that I was limiting – with my expectations, with my ideas
of life – what God could do through me. Because I wasn't willing
to disturb other people. I was very, very concerned about not disturbing
people, not violating their free will. I had gone into the total opposite
extreme of the power people who want to control other people.
All of my life I had been very aware of the issues of power, and I had
taken that to the extreme where I did not want to use any power. And
that, of course, was unbalanced and it limited what God could do through
me.
So when you look at the website, you might get the impression that somehow
I had some kind of undeniable vision that Jesus wanted to do this work
through me. And you might even think that, well did I have some kind
of vision where he appeared to me or I heard a voice booming from heaven
and all this stuff. But it was all inner, intuitive communication. It
was all this very subtle inner sense, of an inner knowing, that Jesus
IS my master and I have volunteered to come into embodiment for a specific
mission.
And you all have a specific mission that you came into embodiment for.
And it is no more or no less important than mine. It’s just different,
it's yours. But in order to find it, in order to discover it, you have
to be willing to look at what are the beliefs in your mind that you
have accepted and that prevent that mission from being fulfilled. Because
your higher self and God and the masters cannot work through you because
you have all of these blocks, you have been boxed in by these beliefs.
And so it would have been very easy and very possible for me to deny
what I am doing today, to doubt it, to explain it away, to excuse it
and say, "Oh, it can't be true."
And I have to tell you that one of the greatest difficulties that I
had to overcome was that I had a background from another ascended master
organization, the Summit Lighthouse, which had a very, very clear teaching
and doctrine and organizational culture that there was only one messenger
and that was the messenger of that organization. And nobody else could
be a messenger, and anyone else who thought they were a messenger was
working with the psychic, was working with the false hierarchy.
And I can assure you that while I was in the Summit Lighthouse, I had
no desire to be a messenger. It never even occurred to me that I could
be that way. So I had no desire for it, I had no longing for it, and
I very much accepted that that was the messenger. I never needed another
one, I never saw anything wrong with the way she was fulfilling her
office. I was perfectly happy with that. And if she had continued in
that role, I probably would never have even dared to my inner prompting.
Recognize that you volunteered for a special mission
So I had many, many things in my own consciousness that could have been
used as an excuse for saying, "Oh this cannot be real. This cannot
be true. This cannot be the real Jesus, this must be some psychic impostor.
Why me? What is special about me?" But the thing is, there is nothing
special about me—other than that when they asked for volunteers
up there in heaven, I said, "I'll go." And you all said the
same thing—that's why you are here.
When they asked who would go and do your mission, you said, "I'll
go." And so it is the same thing for all of us. We have a mission,
and in our outer minds and in our programming – as we grew up
we have been programmed by the forces of anti-Being – that we
do not dare to fulfill that mission. But I am telling you—you
can really come to that point of knowing what your mission is and having
that determination. But in order to do that, you have to look at what
it is in your own psychology that is causing you to doubt, that is causing
you to want to excuse it, to explain it away and say, "Oh I can't—why
me?"
And so, really, there is nothing special about me. In the sense that
there is nothing that I can do that you cannot do. Because I can do
nothing, God in me is everything and that God is in you. And so that
is the awakening that the masters want to see happen. That we all recognize
this and we all simply refuse to accept this consciousness that God
is only in one person and that God can work through only one person.
This is the forces of anti-Being, who as ascended
master Patrick said, that first they will try to beat you down,
and if they cannot do that then they will elevate you to an idol and
say, "Oh yeah, he was special, nobody else can do what he did."
That is what we have to look at and say, “The emperor has nothing
on!” And whatever it is for you individually, for your culture –
because I am realizing more and more that every country has a certain
national consciousness that really has the effect of making everybody
follow the crowd – and so you need to look at that. What
is it in your national awareness that is anti-Being and that prevents
you from Being and fulfilling your mission? Because that is part of
your mission—why you came from different countries is to be the
forerunner to show the people in your country that you can be more spiritual,
and you can overcome that force of anti-Being.
So you need to look at that and look at the culture and see what the
illusions are that are specific to each country. And then overcome them
and just stand up and say, "I have a right to be who I am."
And you might say, "Well how do I know?" or "I don't
have any idea of my divine plan." And as I said, I could have doubted
it all, I could have explained it away. But the one thing that helped
me more than anything else was that I came to understand the necessity
of surrender, the importance of surrender.
Surrender what blocks your mission
So the fact of the matter is that if you have no clear vision of your
mission and divine plan, it is because of something that you have not
surrendered. And that something is preventing you from having that clear
vision. So if you will think about that, you can gradually come to see
what it is you have not surrendered. And then you can let go of it.
I explain on
the website that I came to that point where I literally fell to
my knees and said, "God, you can take me home right now."
And if at that moment, I had died, I would have left this planet in
peace. And that was an incredible step for me, because all of my life
up to that point I had been driven by a sense that I had a mission,
that I had something I needed to do. And I was becoming increasingly
frustrated because I knew I wasn't doing it, I wasn't fulfilling my
mission.
But the reason why I was not fulfilling it was that I had the wrong
vision of what the mission was and how it should be attained. And so,
actually, the more I was pushing to fulfill it, the more I was pushing
it away. And what broke that spiral was that I surrendered everything.
And I said, "Okay if I never do anything on this Earth that makes
any difference, that is okay also." And in that total surrender,
I could then let go of the blocks. And all of a sudden I started seeing
the mission that I had not really dared to see before. Because, as I
said, I had not dared to even think that I could be a mouthpiece for
the masters and be a messenger. I simply did not dare to think that
thought.
And so, many of you might have the same kind of a block, where your
outer mind simply will not accept – or maybe even conceive of
– what your mission is. Because it seems to be beyond you. And
so if you are willing to surrender those expectations of what your mission
should or should not be, if you are willing to go beyond it, well then
you can come to the point of seeing it.
And then the other thing that helped me a lot was that the messenger
of the Summit Lighthouse actually gave a profound lecture on the incarnation
of El Morya as Abraham. And the basic concept of that lecture was that,
again, we tend to think that because Abraham was doing the work for
God, he certainly knew everything that was going to happen and he knew
how everything was going to end up. And so it was easy for him.
But it was not. What she said was that God said to Abraham, "I
have a mighty work to do through you, but I cannot do it in your own
country." But he did not tell Abraham where he was going to end
up. He said, "Start walking!"
And because Abraham was willing to take the first step – without
realizing where he was headed in the end – well then he was open
to direction. And once he had taken the first step, then he could get
direction for how to take the next step, and then the third and so on.
And then after a while he started having a more clear vision and building
a momentum, and then it became easier for him. But if he had not been
willing to take that first step, he would have gotten nowhere.
And it was the same with Jesus. It is the same with all of us. I did
not know what was going to happen. I did not know back then that there
was going to be as many books as there are, that there was going to
be as many teachings on the website as there are. I had no idea that
we would stand here holding a conference. But I was willing to take
the very first step, where I had a limited vision of what Jesus wanted
to do.
And I still have no idea where this is going. I have no idea where this
is going to be in a year or five years. And I have no concern about
it. Because I have gotten to the point where I say, "Well, I don't
need to know. I just need to know that this is what Jesus wants me to
do today."
It's like Jesus said, let the evil of the day be sufficient thereof.
Take no thought for the morrow, for the morrow will take thought for
itself. So, in other words, take that one step at a time, do not worry
about what is coming in the future, just follow the vision and the direction
you have today and start out with something. Because if you do not start,
how could you ever build a momentum? You will get nowhere.
You must be moving to get direction
An analogy I heard once was that if you take a car tire and stand it
on the ground – and it is standing still – if you push it
on the side, it will fall over. But once it is rolling, if you push
it on the side, it is merely going to change direction. And so again,
if you stand there and have done nothing, well God cannot give you any
direction because if he gave you the direction, you would fall over.
But once you start moving, then you can have a greater and greater vision
and then you gradually begin to see where it is leading.
But as I said, I still do not know where it is leading. And I have people
who come up to me and say, "Well, haven't you asked the masters,
haven't you asked them where it's all going and what's going to happen?"
And I say "No. Why would I? I have faith that it is going in the
right direction. Why wouldn't I have?" I am where I am today because
I was willing to follow direction, so as long as I keep following that
direction without being attached to where it is going, well then it
will go in the right direction.
And so it is the same for each of you. You all have a mission, but you
need to start walking before you can really see it. And that is the
important thing. Because I talk to so many people who take the opposite
approach. They want to have the vision and a guarantee before they are
willing to start moving. And so they stand still and they are saying,
"Why can't I see it? Why don't I know where it is? Why doesn't
God tell me?" And they are asking God to tell them, but they haven't
been willing to multiply the talents and start walking. And so you have
to start doing that, you have to be willing to move forward—and
then see where it takes you.
And so I could go on and on. But I think the message really is: Dare
to Be. Dare to be what you see today. And then – when you dare
to be that – then you will see something greater tomorrow. And
when you dare to be that, you will then get a greater and greater vision.
But if you do not start, the process cannot even begin.
And then, as Saint Germain said, you have fallen prey to the forces
of anti-Being who want to prevent you from taking that first step—because
they know that is the easiest point to stop you. Once you have built
a momentum, it becomes harder and harder for them. So if they can stop
you right where you are, that is what they want.
So do not let them have that victory!
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Copyright
© 2008 by Kim Michaels |
